I live in the land of dichotomy between the technical/corporate work world (my Yin) and spiritual education and experiences (my Yang). It proves to be wild and crazy at times and sometimes I tell myself, “How do you do it, Josh?” 🙂 Up until I really started in spiritual studies and interested, I’ve had been consumed by my work and the trapping of the hustle and bustle of corporate pressures and the bred-in/self pressured need to succeed of the past 10-20 years. I’ve been conditioned to the “Go, Go, Go” attitude of growing a business I work for lured by the promotions and promises of a higher paycheck. And I must admit, I have done well thus far. I have climbed the corporate ladder to a fairly high management position but really at the cost of a lot of things. A vibrant personal life, family, etc. I’m OK with it, really but for the past few years, I think the whole game is changed for me. And in a good way. I’m still doing the same job with all the pressures, but now I am using it as a “spiritual gym” so to say. Instead just going to work for work’s sake, I am using the whole corporate experience as a way to test out and put into action all the spiritual books, blogs, YouTube channels, videos, etc. I’ve studied. I’m putting into practice all the lessons I’ve learned in my daily interactions with coworkers or my customers, how I treat my direct reports, how I handle workplace stress, all of it.. Overall, I’d say there hasn’t been a huge change on the outside facing people, since I really have been consistently positive and certainly an outlier in my profession and amongst my peers as a manager and engineer. I’m a lot more “warm and fuzzy” versus the cold/calculating engineer or strict, on-a-power-trip manager.. The people on my teams respect me and they feel I have their best interests at heart, and I provide a space for people to grow and bring their talents forward. Just the way I have been all along, just not consciously until recently. I do sense that my boss and others in the company value my fresh outlook and the loyalty I cultivate from my employees. They just don’t necessarily understand or feel comfortable with me. Which is fine with me.. However, the change I’ve noticed for myself is really on the inside and relationship with Work.
Using my “spiritual gym” metaphor (I really am a sucker for them), I now have the AWARENESS of what’s going on; and all the traps and pitfalls of workplace politics, drama, gossiping, etc. They are easy to spot and diffuse with a non-confrontational style or my refusing to participate. I have that little internal “space” of knowing to catch myself before I get swept up or offended, or whatever. I also have the awareness to back up and look at the big picture of the situation and its context in my whole entire life. Work isn’t the only thing especially one situation on one day. It is really nothing in the scheme of your life. Also, my acknowledgement of better self worth has shown me that life is life and work is only a part small part and that I shouldn’t be killing myself working 80 hrs a week for more $$ and promotions. Certainly high pressure stresses come up all the time (like at least 20 / day, no lie), but if I feel myself getting consumed by it all, I’ve found that I have help from my higher self with a quick message saying “snap out of it, Josh” or “don’t let this consume you” or I’ll get a sudden epiphany or recall some lesson I heard, read, or experienced to bring peace back to my inner space so that I can better tackle what’s going on. And when it happens, I get a little kick out of it and say to my Ego, “Ah ha! Caught you! I don’t think so.. Homey don’t play that” and I’ll actually smile outwardly whether in a meeting on the phone or talking with someone. Sure, I’ll get the occasional, “What’s so funny?” or “Why are you smiling”, but I just say I’m in a good mood or laughing at a inner joke I told myself. 🙂 As I continue to experience, It is definitely one thing to have an intellectual conversation with yourself when reading a book like the 4 Agreements, or the Power of Now, but if you don’t put it into practice, it really is just gossamer. But adding this practice to my work life, it has helped like a spoonful of sugar to keep me enthused enough not to throw in the towel.. As least not yet 😉 And of course, there are days that I go totally unconscious and get wrapped up in it all and I pay the price with my internal energy level. I’m spent, on empty and just want to go home and crawl into bed. I use those days to remind me that I need to be more aware and hold that positive light to repel the evil corporate demons out to get me.. lol.. Just Kidding, for the most part, the only demons are our own. We are all responsible for how we feel and react and I believe we call forth the situation du jour by the way how we feel. At least that’s what I think in my universe.. 🙂
Switching gears, (to the Yang) what I’m starting to realizing is that the other side of the coin is calling me.. The spiritual side.. and right now Spiritual stuff is my little reward I treat myself to on a very infrequent occasion.. Like my trip to Sedona I said always wanted to go on, or treating myself to a spiritual reading or attending a workshop.. Well they are working right now, but I do feel the attraction growing more and more to figure out how to transition it to my livelihood. I’m sure there are TONS of people out there that understand that feeling. Not just to jump to more spiritual stuff, but that transition to be your own boss, starting a business, or just making a TOTAL right turn to make Work, Work for you.. I tell my managers that “enthusiasm is the fuel for success”. If you can be enthused about Anything, the whole universe will back you. I 100% agree. I’ve seen it, time and time again.. It’s happening a million times a day to everyone, in little or grand schemes, but it does make my heart sing to recognize it and be in conscious awareness to witness in action. Even if it isn’t me.. but someone at work, on TV (all the talent shows), or just watching people on the street living life..
Even this little adventure of posting my random thoughts, is just my way of pushing my boundaries to my own growth of the spiritual side. I am just documenting all my thoughts and experiences on this forum so I can look back someday with so much gratitude and reminiscence. I just figured it would be great if someone takes something I write to help them in whatever way. The patchwork of my spiritual beliefs comes from millions of sources and I figured this is better than being locked up in a MS word doc on my computer forever.
I chuckle reading this blog back tonight since I really NO intention of writing this topic (about Work) tonight. I was going to talk about something completely different, but POOF, here it is, so I’ll save my other topic for another post. Probably good anyways as the experience I was going to write about was fleeting and I wasn’t sure how I could write about it anyways. I’m hoping that it continues and intensifies so that I can get to the point of running to the computer to write about.. So I’ll leave it there for a cliff hanger for now… 🙂
Be well, Peace Always, Namaste..